• Mummy Cheese •

Mummy Cheese.

You’re my day 10.

1. I miss you

2. I love you

3. I miss you

Please come back to me.

One of the BEST things to come out of my time at Mothercare. Swear down. I miss calling you after conference calls on a Tuesday to have a chat and occasionally advise you on what to do when a pigeon gets stuck in the shop (RIP Clive).

I got the good vibes from you the first time I met you. Region 9 (I think) meeting in Maidstone. You were the new kid and you walked in with your backpack and I was like “she’s my people, she likes backpacks!!” (honestly, I know, I’m weird)

Since then you’ve just gone up even further in my estimations.

You’re such a support to me, you help me cut through all the noise and remind me to pick the weeds from my garden (so to speak). You say the things I need to hear, even when I’m not really ready to hear or accept them. You just keep saying it until it sinks in and I go ‘you were right’ and you smile and say ‘I know’.

I know that you always have my back. Please know I always have yours.

We have the same (excellent) taste in music and I always looked forward to the conferences/ xmas parties / leaving do’s because I knew we would be on the same team asking the DJ for a bit of Dizzee or old garage chooons.

You love of a good pun is the cherry on top of the cake.

You are beautiful, inside and out, and can rock that Pixie cut in a way that no one else can. You have no idea how jealous that makes me.

I love how much you love your new job.

I love that they are recognising your greatness. You deserve it. I feel like you’ve found your place there and it’s so amazing to hear about and see.

My only issue is that it means we aren’t working together. Please can we work together again?! Some day in the future? Purleeeeaseeee.

Love you, Rachel.

Thanks for being my pal.

xoxo M

• J- Ro •

Day 9 (I think)

JRo.

If anyone ever needs proof that opposites attract then they need look no further than us.

Honestly.

Even your Ma has commented on how different we are.

Our friendship just works though, and I’m so glad it does. I think we balance each other out.

You’re one of my most low maintenance friendships. We go months and months without any contact and then when we do chat, it’s like old times. Nothing’s changed.

I know that I can be hard work, and I know that I’m not always the easiest person for you to be friends with – sometimes our differences are glaringly obvious and that can cause some friction. I know, without you saying anything, that there have been times when you don’t know if you’re coming or going with me and for that I apologise. I want you to know that I’m glad you have stuck around though.

My first and original travel buddy – we’ve had some adventures! I love how keen you are to see the world and how educated on EVERYTHING you are. You are, without a doubt, my smartest friend.

Our adventures have taken us all over Europe and the US. The most glamorous moment of my life is still brushing my teeth in Walmart when we were RVing!! I’m so glad I got to do that with you by my side.

You have the kindest heart of anyone I know – you are my moral compass at times. Not a bad word to say about anyone (except maybe Trump), you lead with love and compassion.

Like me, you just want world peace.

I’m so glad I met you. I’m so glad I get to call you my friend.

I can’t wait to see you in May, give you a big ‘ole hug and make some more memories.

All the love, JRo. All the love

xoxo M

• Steph •

Stephanie Hall.

You Goddess.

When I try and describe my friends it’s always a hard thing to do because there are always so deliciously complex that to only use one word / one phrase would do them an injustice.

You are no different.

The best way I can describe you is this though – you’re the inner voice everyone should have.

You know how fuck boys always have a habit of coming back just as you’ve moved on? Well you always seem to have a habit of checking in just when I am about done with life and all it’s shit. How do you knoooow??? LITERALLY.

I still remember the first time I met you, just a couple of small town girls, living in a small town world (Big up Guildford). You and Gemma both got the job at Mothercare and told Diane that you didn’t know each other… then spent your first shift walking around the floor together. I remember saying to Huma “they’re obviously mates”. Didn’t hide it well, hun 😂

Then there was the jumper out the back (that was pretty traumatic) but you were just as nosy and me about it and I knew then you were just like me.

You were always down for a laugh and weren’t scared of making a fool of yourself for it and I LOVE THAT ABOUT YOU. This probably sounds rude but I’m gonna say it anyway – you wouldn’t expect someone so hot to be so funny. You’re bloody hilarious.

We’ve come along way from cleaning porches on a Sunday and being sung to by the homeless folk of Guildford (he was right, you are beautiful) and I’m so glad I’ve got to stand by the sidelines and watch you blossom into a kind hearted, successful, beautiful woman.

Instagram has such a filter on it and I know behind the happy grins and ‘carefree’ life on those squares there is a lot of hard work and effort that allows you to enjoy the best of what life has to offer. You deserve all of it and so much more.

You are such a force and I’m so glad I get to feel that in my world (sounded less dodgy in my head lol)

Keep on being you, because you are just wonderful.

I love you.

M xoxo

• Lisa •

Dear Liseeeee,

Linda Lash, Lisa, Liza… I never know which name to call you because normally I just call you rude names 😉

I don’t even really know where to begin. I guess, Happy Birthday to your boy?!

Nicholas Brian Lashaway! 31 years ago you birthed that force of nature. What a treat. I hope today isn’t too hard for you, I hope that you are able to laugh at what a tit he could be amongst the sadness. Also, remember I’m forever judging you for never having made him sit down and watch ‘Mary Poppins’ 😂

I guess I should move on to saying the nice things now, ay? You know me, I’m a bit awkward and so very British about this kind of stuff. Show emotion, me? Say what!

I’m only good at being nice when I’m drunk normally… however I will do my best now.

Lisa,

Lisa,

Lisa.

What a woman.

Someone who I admire for being a hippy at heart (like me) but also for not taking any shit from anyone (a skill I’m still learning)

Maker of one of the best margaritas ever – at this point I’m convinced your mama (Queen) taught you all how to do this because your sisters make killer ones too.

An essential skill if you ask me.

My very first memory of you is our holiday in one of my favourite places in the world – Valencia. When I left there in 2010 I left a peice of my heart there so it was so special that I got to go back there with you, Soph and Jade in 2012. It was like going home for me and I was so proud to show off my city (yes, it’s my city in my head).

I remember being sat on the couch in the apartment the morning after we got there and you walked in the room and farted and then said good morning everyone. Sophie assured me that meant you liked me because you wouldn’t have felt comfortable enough to do that if you didn’t!

Add that to me realising we both loved peanut m&ms and men with good arms on that trip – I knew you were a good egg.

Over the years we’ve had sooooo many amazing trips/ visits together – let us never forget the delicious man candy in Naples, singing ‘Don’t stop believing’ on the drive from Boston to the Cape, introducing you to Honest Burger in London, crying with laughter at the Book of Mormon (we definitely should have bought a fuck frog).

I also have to mention that amazing family of yours… I know I tell you all the time how much I love them! All 750 of them, who are also now my family regardless of whether they want to be or not 😂 Surely its time for another reunion? It’s been 6 years since the last one! I’m definitely overdue for a dance party with my best friend Ben, gal pal Rachel and Princess Charlotte!

My favourite times though are us sitting in the man cave swiping left and right on Tinder, eating donuts Mark made me drive to Hollywood to get, watching Catfish (Nev has great teeth) and drinking whilst fighting over the pups.

You are hilarious (another trait we share – obvs). You make me laugh so much and are so supportive of everything I do even when it makes no sense. You’re great at reminding me that whatever happens is all part of the journey. We all need a friend that does that.

When Nick passed… I can’t even begin to fathom what you went through, and continue to go through daily. The way that you carry yourself through your grief and continue to live life is truly inspiring. I know there are days when the grief feels too much to bear but you do it because you are you. The Lisa we all know and love doesn’t let it beat her… hero.

Amongst your own grief you’ve managed to provide comfort to someone else in my life who has experienced this type of loss… having never met them and you did it without being asked to. It means so much to ME that you did that, let alone them.

I’m so blessed to know you (I really hate when people say ‘blessed’ but I feel like it’s the only appropriate word).

I’m so proud to have you in my corner. I’m so grateful that Jade chose me to be her friend because without that little cherry blossom I’d not have met you, nor Nick.

You are so fetch.

You big shitbag.

Love you! See you in May

xoxo Michaeleee

moments to memories

I am fully in the Christmas spirit now, I had my first Christmas party yesterday and I’m feeling festive. I surprisingly did not wake up with a raging hangover but felt pretty fresh.

The last week or so I have been thinking about my favourite memories I’ve made in the last year. I have, overall, had a crackin’ 2017. Sure, there have been some terrible, terrible lows but I can look back on the year and see where the good times are and smile.

Here are some of my highlights from 2017

Dis-day 2018.

you cannot beat starting the new year off with Mickey and co.

 

 

LA KINGS Game

i finally, finally, finally found myself out in LA in season to go to an ice hockey game. it did not disappoint.

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Arlo was born.

my adorable second godson/nephew who isn’t my nephew but is was born. he is a dream.

 

Irish adventures.

one of my favourite countries in the world, the sexiest accent in the world and some of my favourite people in the world. i can never go wrong with a trip there.

going back to my old job.

the best decision i have made this year. swear down.

 

star wars day

friends and star wars. i don’t think i really need to add anything else to that, do i?

 

 

Nick Lashaway day

the best day with my American familia, celebrating one of the best! on a day that could have been so so so sad we all managed to smile and laugh through the tears at memories of Nick and i certainly learnt more about him on that day. the strength his whole family have shown, none more than his mama, is incredible. it was a beautiful day filled with love and i am so privileged to have been a part of it.

 

 

london zoo 

my two favourite chicken nuggets took me to the zoo for my birthday because they know i love that shit. i love spending time with them playas. couple of the year.

Passenger concert

the first of my two favourite memories based at Kew Gardens this year. i have loved Passenger and his music for a wee while and i was finally able to go to see him live. in typical british summer style it was absolutely pissing down but as soon as he hit the stage i forgot about the rain. what a gem.

Brighton 

in the summer my best pal, my 2 nephews and i spent the day on brighton beach watching The Lion King. hashtag winning

Kew gardens 2

i spent  a lovely day here in the summer with my pals amy and byng. we went to see byngs younger brother in The Wind and the Willows. the sun shone, the play was super cute and we laughed. loads. i really have great friends.

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annie

tomorrow, tomorrow, i love yaaaa, tomorrow! for my sisters birthday we all went to see annie in the west end. miranda hart played miss hannigan – she was a scream. i enjoyed it so much – i normally cry at the theatre and this was no exception. a great day.

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NYC

back to the concrete jungle where dreams are made of to celebrate momma sophs birthday. we hung out with old friends, julie came down from boston for a day, it was magicallll.

 

montrose days

i always enjoy trips back to montrose and this time was no different. whilst mark and i were driving around montrose singing along to some pop song, i had a moment where i just thought, yeah. i like my life.

mj

this time last year my nephew and i really weren’t pals. this year we made friends. he’s just a wee dote. i love him.

 

xmas party

the last minute entry was yesterday’s xmas party. i bloody love my work collegues, i bloody love my boss. i just bloody love my job. don’t get me wrong it does my feckin’ head in from time to time but i have great people around me to lean on if it gets too much.

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2017 isn’t quite done yet, i know but it was fun thinking back over the last year and what i’ve got up to. some is here, some isn’t. with a busy december coming up i’m sure i will have more memories to add to these by the end of the month.

i hope you have a december filled with festive cheer.

until next week,

M xoxo

 

 

 

 

 

reflections on a younger self. 

last night i found myself looking through my old journals and diaries. i don’t know why but as i was placing a book on my bookshelf i saw them and decided to pull some out and relive what i’d lived. 

a lot of the entries are not dated so i don’t know the last time i wrote in them – i can only guess it was around this time 2 years ago because of what i’d written about in them, certain incidents in my life that happened then are the focus of my last scribbles.

what i do know reading them is that i’ve changed. i can see the change in myself through the words on the page. is that weird? life is the strangest thing – we don’t see that we’re moving forward day to day but when we look back so much has changed. so much has happened. 

i like this person i’m becoming.

even on the days when i can’t see through the fog, even on the days when i want the world to go away. i like the person i am becoming. 

i look back at my old entries and feel what i felt back then but i am also able to see it differently. i can see the heart and heartbreak i felt over the boy who didn’t love me enough to not hurt me, the boy i would have moved across oceans for had he asked me again and not only see my pain, but also his. who am i to say he didn’t love me enough just because he didn’t love me the way i wanted him to love me. i can see the good in that goodbye.

i read back through the confusion and see that i have gained clarity, not in everything, but in some things. and for now that is enough.

i look at the old entries and see someone who was fighting against herself but couldn’t see that’s what she was doing. who thought that emotions were a sign of weakness (especially the sad ones). i was so proud of being so guarded and so unfeeling to the world. i was so proud of never having shared my true self with anyone. 

i thought that made me strong.

in actual fact i think now it showed my weakness, my insecurity. the ability to feel, to show emotions – the good and the bad – is part of what makes us so wonderfully human. you can’t shut it out, you can’t shut yourself off from it. you can try, but it will catch  up with you eventually. everything you run from always does.

i know more about me now.

what i want

where i want to go

life makes it hard to remember those things  sometimes but that’s why i write. it reminds me who i am and what i want. it focuses me when i need direction. when i need to get stuff off my chest. when i need a friend. there’s always a piece of paper and a pen around, no matter what time of the day it is. 

when i get lost i can pick those friends up and draw myself a map back home. 

xoxo

micks.

pictures of me from 2008 to the present day. there is one every year from 2008 doing various things with various people. the only year missing is 2016 because it wouldn’t fit!

This song reminds me of you

What I’m listening to: Pentatonix; PTX Vol. IV – Classics (dem harmonies, though!)

 

 

Hiya pals,

I hope you’re all well. I’ve had a lovely weekend of work and general social merriment. I’ve even found time to start reading a new book after not having read anything since April (we can safely say that my aim of reading 2 books a month went out the window, ay) This book though, I’m in it hook, line and sinker. It’s called ‘I am missing’ by Tim Weaver about a guy that wakes up on a beach with no memory trying to find out who he is. I’m intrigued.

Anyway, today’s post is about the best therapy – music. I have posted before about how much I love it, my history with it and even my Desert Island Discs.

I always have and always will believe music is one of the few things that can bring people together. I have so many memories tied to songs; both good and bad memories. They are both as important as each other.

 

There are also songs that remind me of certain people – the other day in the car I was listening to Magic (my absolute fave station, no shame) and no less than four songs came on in a row that reminded of my best friend, Rachel.

  1. Hold on by Wilson Phillips – it’s ‘our’ song
  2. Despacito – Luis Fonzi and Daddy Yankee – anything Spanish we tie to each other as we became pals when we lived in Valencia
  3. I Gotta Feeling by The Black Eyed Peas – it was the soundtrack to so many nights out in Valencia.
  4. Fast Car by Tracy Chapman – one of Rachel’s favourite songs (if not her favourite) so it always makes me think of her when I see her.

N.B when I say the other day I can mean anything from 6 months ago until yesterday

Then because I’m self-centred I wanted to know what songs remind other people of me so I asked.

Here’s what they said…

 

Sophie

Mulan – Reflection, because I think you’re still trying to find yourself

Frozen – Let it Go, because we ran around Paris singing this (much to Leanne’s embarrassment)

I’ll make a man out of you from Mulan reminds me of Sophia because we both love it. As soon as one of us says ‘Let’s get down to business’ that’s it, get ready for the show.

 

Leanne

Brown Sugar – The Rolling Stones; “I don’t know why, just ‘cause”

(I have no idea how Leanne’s brain works as we have never listened to this song together)

Anything Ed Sheeran because he is Leanna’s favourite. Also, Elvis ‘Can’t help falling love’ reminds me of Sophia and Leanna because it is ‘their’ song and it’s so cute!

 

Rachel

Hold on – Wilson Phillips “because it’s our song”

I Gotta Feeling – The Black Eyed Peas “because Valencia”

Anything by Jason Derulo “because you used to be obsessed with him” (It’s true, sorrynotsorry)

Carlos Baute – Te Regalo – this song is sooooo cheesy but we both love it

 

Aside from the ones I mentioned earlier, anything UB40. They’re her fave.

 

Diane

Summertime Sadness by Lana Del Ray “You were sad for such a long time and it makes me smile to think how far you’ve come”

 

How nice is that? Thanks, Dalbs. Mine for Diane are Amy Winehouse – Rehab and Rick Astley ‘Never Gonna Give You Up’ , we spent sooooo many afternoons sorting the delivery out dancing and singing to these songs. Oh and Sugababes ‘About You Now’ that was another one we danced to.

Amy

I see the light – Tangled “your fave”

Do it like a dude – Jessie J “you put it on a CD for me when we were on placement together and sang it allll the time in the car”

I was made for loving you – Tori Kelly and Ed Sheeran “you suggested it to me for our wedding and it made it on our wedding playlist”

Girls by Marina and the Diamonds because Ams said it was written about me and I’ve always remembered that, Ho Hey by the Lumineers because it was another song at her wedding and also 5,6,7,8 by Steps because she loves a line dance…

Charlie

Paolo Nutini – Candy “I don’t know why, it just does”

Anything by Taylor Swift “because of our epic singalongs in the car”

Taylor Swift, for exactly the same reason plus ‘Dreams’ by Fleetwood Mac (such a tune)

 

Byng

Walkashame – Meghan Trainor “reminds me of the car ride to Norfolk for Amy’s wedding

Love on Top – Beyonce “we listened to it loads when we stayed in London”

 

Call Me Maybe – Carly Rae Jepson. If you are ever lucky enough to meet Byng ask her about this song and Milan. That’s all I’m gonna say.

 

Jade

Happy – Pharrell Williams “every time it comes on my mom says ‘Oh I miss Michaela’ “

Let her go – Passenger / Best Song Ever – One Direction “because you listened to Passenger loads on the road trip and drove me mad with the One Direction one on the trip too.

It’s not my fault, Harry Styles is my one true love he just doesn’t know it yet. The song that always reminds me of Jade is Ryan Bingham ‘The Weary Kind’, I remember we were front row for one of his shows in Kings Cross and we both cried at this song and he cried too!

I know for sure I asked other people but in a move that is completely out of character I cannot find where I wrote them down and I have a habit of clearing all my chats so I can’t even go back and check. My bad.

Send them to me again, sure.

I’ll try not to lose them this time.

Xoxo

Micks